Mad, sad, glad - Gathering Voices: Faithful Conversations from The ...

A Gathering Voices post by Lynne M. Baab

About four years ago, my husband?s sister Connie was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer. We?re coming up on the one-year anniversary of her death.

Connie and Dave had been close as children and teenagers, but drifted apart as adults. They saw each other only every few years, and occasionally exchanged birthday cards in between. She lived on the other side of the country, and if we hadn?t traveled in her direction every few years, we would never have seen her because she made no effort to come and see us.

After Connie?s diagnosis, Dave decided to try to make contact by phone as often as possible. They settled into a rhythm of talking every week for about an hour. (We now live on the other side of the world, but one of the blessings of life here in New Zealand is cheap phone cards.) Connie and Dave talked about their childhood, the pattern of their adult life, and God.

Connie had not attended church very often, but she was now motivated to make some sort of contact with God because she wanted to be healed. She had very young grandchildren who she adored. I sent her emails every so often, telling her I was praying for her, and she would always write back, ?Pray for healing.? Which I did. Dave prayed for healing as well.

In the weekly conversations she had with Dave, they kept talking about God. Dave often read the Bible over the phone, and prayed with her. He told her that the God we know in Jesus Christ was calling her to trust in God alone. At that point she was hedging her bets and covering all bases, engaging with a lot of New Age stuff as well as Jesus. As the months passed, she increasingly gave her life into Jesus? hands in trust and love. As her cancer kept coming back after each round of treatment, she began to believe in the hope of heaven, and she began to rejoice in God?s love for her.

About six months before she died, Dave made a trip halfway around the world to see her. For two weeks, he helped around the house, talked with her for hours, and prayed with her. He had felt God?s nudging to make this trip, and he is still so grateful he followed that nudge. They restored their childhood friendship, and he got to help her solidify her new faith as well.

But she died. I?m mad that cancer is everywhere, and I?m mad that we don?t know what causes so much of it. I?m sad that Dave lost his sister, and I?m sad for her husband, kids and grandkids. I?m glad she turned to God in her last years, and I?m glad Dave responded to God?s nudges in phoning her and going to see her so they could restore their friendship.

I recently heard about a friend who experienced a similar thing ? a family member who died too young, but who in the last weeks and months turned to God in a new way. This friend has been criticized in his church because he obviously did something wrong, evidenced by the fact that his prayers for healing were not answered. I?m mad because no one should have to bear that kind of criticism. I?m sad because he lost someone he loved, and also has to cope with criticism as he?s mourning. I?m glad for the restored relationship he experienced with this family member, and for his family member?s turning to God.

I asked Dave to read this column before I posted it, and he said in response, ?I?m mad that people expect God to dance to their tune and heal them in a physical sense when he?s doing something far deeper and more profound. I?m mad that some people don?t see that God healed Connie by giving her enough faith to trust in Jesus for eternal life. God gave her a peaceful death and healed my relationship with her. I?m glad for all of that, and I?m glad I will see her again. And I?m still sad because I miss her.?

Mad, sad, glad. What a mess of emotions. What complex people we are. Lord have mercy on us.

Source: http://blog.thethoughtfulchristian.com/2012/03/mad-sad-glad.html

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