Sunday, February 19, 2012

How to Avoid Falling into the Friend Zone | OaReal!

Turn On Your Flirt Quotient: This comes easily to most guys but the key is to time your actions perfectly and keep it brief. A friend will hold or hug much longer (and perhaps more sincerely) than a flirt! Remember that your intention is not to be insensitive but bring in that ?distance? or ?line of control?, so that she gets the hint that you?re not comfortable with all the touchy-feely unless you?re in a relationship that warrants that! Take advantage of lonely times with her and drop the subtle clues without getting too physical. Try to work up just enough chemistry to leave her thinking about what just happened.

Ensure you Have a Chance: If the woman is already attracted to another guy and heading towards a serious relationship with him, don?t slide yourself in between them. If eventually they?re not meant for each other and you?re willing to wait, you may be blowing your own chances by being a jerk.

Don?t be a Doormat: This is true for any relationship, but more relevant if you?re looking for a romantic future with a person. Don?t be too available for running errands, helping out or as a shoulder to cry on. Use your discretion because this is different for every relationship. You don?t want to come across as a callous dork but you also have ?other engagements? that you cannot just drop and rush to be with her at all times. Be there for her at times and at other times, not so much.

Don?t be an Agony Aunt: Is she sharing her every emotional struggle with you, especially concerning guys? Don?t counsel her to the point that she sees you as her father figure to turn to in case of failed love affairs or guys being mean to her. Be supportive and protective, but don?t offer too much advice, and state your views in a matter-of-fact manner. You may use this opportunity to convey subtly that you?re not all that comfortable discussing her other love liaisons.

Man Up a Bit: Don?t switch off your chivalrous instincts, instead grow one if you don?t already have it. Even in this day and age of active feminism and gender equality, women are invariably turned on by reasonable acts of chivalry that are not over the top. So don?t give a lot of thought and be self-judgmental about say, giving her a ride to the airport or being present in a time of severe personal loss. However, be careful not to become her regular ?on-call? chauffeur or a regular babysitter to her sister?s kids. Quit walking her dog every evening.

Date Other Women: Unless you?re almost sure she?s attracted to you and you?re close to making her your girlfriend soon, be normal around other women. Look around, date other women like you would do normally. Not to sound like scorning your lady love, but you can watch her reactions and look for that streak of jealousy just to reassure yourself that she is at least a slight bit interested. Everything is fair in love including using her jealousy to your advantage. Again, don?t overdo this or you?ll scare her away for good.

Pop the Question: The above techniques are for consciously avoiding the friend zone. But sooner or later you have to quit trying and face up to the results of your strategic tactics. Yes, find the right moment and let her know your true feelings. Do this as soon as you know she also may have the same feelings. If you?re not sure after all that while, well, there?s only one way to find out. You may be potentially throwing away a friendship, but then that?s not what you were looking for anyway, right?

Source: http://oareal.com/?p=388

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